Initial Reactions to the VVS Mailer

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Subject: Re: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
From: Sora Hasegawa (sora@stellvia.lib)
To: recruitment@sovietairforce.fen
Date: 7/01/2013 9:20 AM


Gentlebeings,

Please find attached my application and resum for an engineering position in your Exploration Wing. I am skilled in life-support and drive engineering, and have experience repairing Interwave and other communications technology. Also, I am fluent in both English and Japanese.

Should you require a reference, please contact Noah Scott at big-cheese@stellvia.lib.


Sora Hasegawa


(Attached: sora-hasegawa-resume.txt)


From: kirk.teller@amberstaracademy.venus
Reply-to: kirk.teller@amberstaracademy.venus; tabby.small@amberstaracademy.venus
To: recruitment@sovietairforce.fen
Subject: RE: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
Date: 1 July 2013

Sirs,

We are Kirk Teller and Tabitha Small and we would appreciate your consideration for any available position in your expedition. While we are still students at Amberstar Academy we believe you will find the attached transcripts to show an excellent work ethic and useful knowledge.

I, Kirk, enjoy both programming and cooking. Attached is a program I wrote in the last month that attempts to identify constellations in images and a recipe for my own variation on Peppered Chicken and Fettuccine Alfredo. Also attached is are letters of reference from two of my instructors and Melissa Sharp of the former Crystal Osaka Food Crop Test Labs.

Tabitha has received high marks in astronomy and maths and has been a member for two years of the Crystal Kyoto Hydroponic Garden Club. Attached are letters of reference as well as Tabitha's most recent research paper for astronomy which compares articles on gamma-ray bursts published in the last seven years to prior publications concluding that handwavium has not had an impact on research into this subject.

We are well aware that we qualify only for junior positions in your expedition. However we would be honored to serve in any capacity.


Subject: Re: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
From: KJ (2501@globalfrequency.fen)
To: Mal (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Date: 7/01/2013 11:43 AM

Hey bossman... crap, I'm a Colonel now? Oh well, sure, why not. Obviously somewhat in the middle of stuff, but love to go otherwise. Not the same, y'know? Next time.

Dee wants to send a her or two along, if you'd be amenable. I think she was working on the fullsized one, but haven't asked if it's done or not yet. Anyway, lemme know if you want her sending a formal application or somesuch.

Ack, meatspace calls. Later.

-KJ


Subject: Re: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
From: Mal (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: KJ (2501@globalfrequeny.fen)
Date: 1 July 2013 12:20 PM

I'd offer my congratulations, but somehow I don't think you'd appreciate them.

In all honesty, I'd sleep sounder if I knew you were minding my engines, but at the same time you're the only other person on the crew who's as deep into OGJ as I am. If I'm leaving for three months, you're the obvious person to keep our irons in the fire while I'm gone.

Shad and Calc are staying behind; Calc'll mind the home office, and I'm seconding Shad to you for the duration. I recommend letting him whip Azu Squadron into shape as they start coming online, he's good at that. Otherwise, you've got command of our robot death squads, so use 'em well.

Re: Dee... I'm willing to bring one of her along, but there's no way in hell I'm letting Action-Figure!Dee aboard any of the ships. There's weird and then there's Weird, and Action-Figure!Dee is too Weird to have running around loose with so many mundanes on board. Tell here fullsize, AI or not at all. If she agrees, I'll probably have her as chief engineer on Special Project #1 (assuming the damned thing is ready on time).

--Mal


Subject: Re: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
From: Dee (deechan@sovietairforce.fen)
To: Mal (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Date: 7/01/2013 12:37 PM

Yes, I'm reading over KJ's shoulder... so to speak.

Anyway, I can do fullsize; the Mk.1 body's done. Mostly human... ah, you've seen the avatars and whatnot. The fact that it looks cyber isn't really apparent when wearing long shirt and pants, if it's important. Odd eye colors, but programmable they are. I'll blend in as much as ye want me to.

I would like to take one or two of the Troyers if possible; they come in no end of help with tight spaces and whatnot, or just an extra pair of hands. They're actually remote controlled only, it just doesn't look that way sometimes... and believe it or not, I only really try to weird out you guys with them. If needed, I can reconfigure to a basic ball-with-manipulators look for them... or leave 'em. Again, your call.

I am bringing a "ship" of my own though... don't worry, it's small enough to fit in Ptichka. You'll see.

-D


From: Maj. Amy O'Connell (A_OConnell@tsab.usaf.mil)
To: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Subject: RE: Delta Pavonis Expedition
Date Posted: 2 July 2013

Colonel Fnord - After much discussion, the United States Air Force has decided to offer the services of two of our science specialists to your expedition.

Doctor Marie Cabot is a space-sciences specialist with extensive systems engineering background; she would be well suited to assist in your engineering department when not busy with astrometrics.

Doctor Simon Alvers has degrees in astrophysics and meteorology, he has just finished an extensive project surveying Jupiter's Great Red Spot (I've attached a copy of his paper for your perusal, should you not have come across it previously). He is very interested in participating in the survey of any planetary bodies you may discover, particularly should they have an atmosphere worthy of meteorological study.

We will provide them with a small support staff and appropriate equipment, as well as a Federal funding grant to support their inclusion in your expedition. Copies of the personnel jackets for the proposed team are attached; the file encryption password is the code-name you used during Operation Zig.

TSAB logo.png

Maj. Amy O'Connell, PhD
United States Air Force
Transrationality Scientific Analysis Bureau
Space Station Benjamin Franklin
A_McConnel@tsab.usaf.mil


From: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: Maj. Amy O'Connel (A_OConnel@tsab.usaf.mil)
Cc: jagohg@research.unimelb.edu.au, mira@casa.colorado.edu, deltapavonis@ap.stmarys.ca
Subject: RE: Delta Pavonis Expedition
Date Posted: 2 July 2013

Major McConnel,

The expedition's scientific contingent is not being assembled through the Soviet Air Force. It is a joint effort through the University of Melbourne, the University of Colorado-Boulder and St. Mary's Univeristy, Halifax. I have forwarded Dr. Cabot and Dr. Alvers' CVs to the respective expedition heads. If they fit available slots, they will be contacted.

As for our landing craft, Ptichka and two other primary vehicles will be capable of surface operations under normal conditions. We have also designed & built several light orbital/low-g landing craft based loosely on the Flight Design CTsw.

Col. Malaclypse Fnord
Commander-in-Chief, Soviet Air Force


From: Maj. Amy O'Connell (A_OConnell@tsab.usaf.mil)
To: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Subject: RE: Delta Pavonis Expedition
Date Posted: 2 July 2013

Colonel Fnord;

> The expedition's scientific contingent is not being
> assembled through the Soviet Air Force. It is a joint
> effort through the University of Melbourne, the University
> of Colorado-Boulder and St. Mary's Univeristy, Halifax. I
> have forwarded Dr. Cabot and Dr. Alvers' CVs to the
> respective expedition heads. If they fit available slots,
> they will be contacted.

This is understood and appreciated by the scientific staff; it was Colonel SITM Caldwell who insisted that we notify you first as mission commander. I'd love to go myself, but I've got too much to do here - maybe next trip out.

> As for our landing craft, Ptichka and two other primary
> vehicles will be capable of surface operations under
> normal conditions. We have also designed & built several
> light orbital/low-g landing craft based loosely on the
> Flight Design CTsw.

Glad to hear it. We have some folk who've been toying with pure-hardtech designs (obviously) for landing and survey craft with variable geometry to adapt to differing atmospheres; we've carried out several local tests but we'd love to see them tried out-system. Would you be willing to take a couple of prototypes along? We've got them fitted out as remote-operated UAVs right now with a good set of survey gear.... If you're interested, drop us a line.

TSAB logo.png

Maj. Amy O'Connell, PhD
United States Air Force
Transrationality Scientific Analysis Bureau
Space Station Benjamin Franklin
A_McConnel@tsab.usaf.mil


From: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: Maj. Amy O'Connel (A_OConnel@tsab.usaf.mil)
Subject: RE: Delta Pavonis Expedition
Date Posted: 2 July 2013

> This is understood and appreciated by the scientific staff;
> it was Colonel SITM Caldwell who insisted that we notify you
> first as mission commander. I'd love to go myself, but I've
> got too much to do here - maybe next trip out.

Of course. Perhaps next time your superior will check with his superiors regarding protocol before making another generous offer.

> Would you be willing to take a couple of prototypes along?
> We've got them fitted out as remote-operated UAVs right now
> with a good set of survey gear.... If you're interested,
> drop us a line.

Unfortunately, between our own hardware, the science team's hardware, Federation prototypes and the documentary crew we are already overburdened with equipment, despite travelling with seven elephants. I am afraid we'll have to pass on your offer.

Col. Malaclypse Fnord
Commander-in-Chief, Soviet Air Force


From: fnord@sovietairforce.fen
To: kirk.teller@amberstaracademy.venus, tabby.small@amberstaracademy.venus
Cc: student.office@amberstaracademy.venus, jagohg@research.unimelb.edu.au, mira@casa.colorado.edu
Subject: Re: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
Date: 3 July 2013

Mr. Teller and Ms. Small,

As the both of you are students, I cannot in good conscience consider your application as members of the Soviet Air Force. This is the part of the program where I would normally spout all sorts of platitudes about the importance of education, but I'm sure you've heard them all before so we'll skip it.

However, in light of your academic credentials, I am willing to consider you both as part of the non-VVS scientific contingent. I have forwarded your application to the heads of the mundane science team, Dr. Miranda Delgado at the University of Colorado-Boulder, and Dr. Henry Jago at the University of Melbourne. If they agree, you will have the opportunity to join either the CU or UMelbourne science teams as nominal undergraduates.

Expect to hear from myself, Dr. Delgado or Dr. Jago within the next week regarding their decision.

Col. Malaclypse Fnord
Commander-in-Chief, Soviet Air Force


Subject: Re: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
From: fnord@sovietairforce.fen
To: sora@stellvia.lib
Date: 3 July 2013

Ms. Hasegawa,

Please reply with the first date you would be available for an interview at our Kandor City facility.

Col. Malaclypse Fnord
Commander-in-Chief, Soviet Air Force


Subject: Hasegawa
From: Mal (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: Noah (big-cheese@stellvia.lib)
Date: 3 July 2013

Just for my own peace of mind, you didn't alienate yet another female, did you?

--Mal


Subject: Re: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
From: sora@stellvia.lib
To: fnord@sovietairforce.fen
Date: 3 July 2013

I am available for an interview immediately; my current employer has been kind enough to waive the normal notice period for my resignation.

Thank you for considering my application.

Sora Hasegawa


Subject: Re: Hasegawa
From: Noah (big-cheese@stellvia.lib)
To: Mal (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Date: 3 July 2013

> Just for my own peace of mind, you didn't alienate yet another female, did you?

No, this wasn't anything I did. I wish it was...

Sora's still not completely over last month. (The memorial service didn't really help her.) She needs to get away from everything that brings back old memories, and that's where you're going.

If you do hire her, Mal, please do me a favor: don't show her any special consideration. I love Sora like a daughter - hell, she is my daughter in all but blood - but that doesn't mean you have to.

Noah


Subject: Interview
From: fnord@sovietairforce.fen
To: sora@stellvia.lib
Date: 3 July 2013

If you're immediately available for interview, then there's no point in delaying it. Is 1100 Kandor time tomorrow acceptable? If so, we'll be interviewing at Korolev Air Base, on the outer wall near the west gate. We're in MapQuest if you need more thorough directions.

Bring a copy of your CV (not that we actually *need* one, but it's SOP) and your game face. If the interview goes well enough, we'll jump straight into operational planning once you've signed yourself over to us.

If you aren't available for the suggested time, suggest another one and we'll work around it.

Col. Malaclypse Fnord (who's gonna have to bump his rank to MGen soon enough)
Commander-in-Chief, Soviet Air Force


Subject: Re: Hasegawa
From: Mal (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: Noah (big-cheese@stellvia.lib)
Date: 3 July 2013

> Sora's still not completely over last month. (The memorial
> service didn't really help her.) She needs to get away
> from everything that brings back old memories, and that's
> where you're going.

Hm. That's information I needed to hear, and probably wasn't going to get from her.

> If you do hire her, Mal, please do me a favor: don't show
> her any special consideration. I love Sora like a daughter
> - hell, she is my daughter in all but blood - but that
> doesn't mean you have to.

We'll see. On paper she's one of the top five applicants so far, and I've got three positions she'd be good for. With what you've told me, well... we'll see.

--Mal, wondering when the VVS became the Legion Etrangre Spatiales


From: K.Schrodinger (schroedinger@trigon.gov)
To: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Subject: Soviet Air Force Now Hiring for Interstellar Work
Timestamp: 03072013

Mal, there's been a bit of an issue over here, apparently soon as your call hit the ether. Thing is, I didn't exactly figure it out 'till now, so ... um ... don't shoot the black-and-white checkered teardrop hull that's likely to show up at the gathering point.

Apparently, Harley's discovered her wanderlust. It's just that she did so when we put her to running that drone carrier testbed we've been trying to get operational.The good news is, we got it working, the bad news is, she nabbed the prototype, reasearch data and all, so I'd be very much in your debt if you do not, I repeat, _do not_ blast it out of space. Despite the hyena laugh. Please?

See attached databite for recorded operational specifics.

-K.Schrodinger

Attach: SS Killing Joke.txt


From: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: K.Schrodinger (schroedinger@trigon.gov)
Subject: ...you've gotta be kidding me.
Date: 3 July 2013

What the hell is it with you and runaway AIs, anyway?

...On second thought, I probably don't want to know the answer to that.

We really don't need or want a dedicated engine of death on the expedition. However, we *could* use a good C&C AI. We've got a bird in the final stages of conversion, but it looks like it won't have an integrated AI. How embedded is Harley into your new toy's subsystems? If she can hotswap I'm willing to bring her aboard, otherwise no dice.

--Mal


From: Elena Vangeek (susan@sovietairforce.fen)
To: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Subject: If there's still room
Date: 3 July 2013

Hey boss man.

I know I'm late in the game, but I'm tired of just running shipments for folks and hiding from Boskones. Gods, y'know the other day I running some ore and had to pull a Han Solo on this ship...anyways. As you can tell, I ain't cut out for this stuff. I know I'm a half decent pilot, but I don't know if my skills are more needed here or with you guys. If you still need a hand, pilot, cook, I'm available.

I mean, what else am I going to do?


From: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: Elena Vangeek (susan@sovietairforce.fen)
Subject: Re: If there's still room
Date: 3 July 2013

Well, you know as well as I do this is the big test for the expansion project. We've got to prove that we can *do* this, instead of being "just" a gaggle of freaky movie people.

That said... combat-wise, most of KJ's projects are built to be AI-only (shock, horror), so there's not much room for a pilot there. And with four ships in the expedition fleet we're going to need a fair number of people...

Here's the deal. If you want, I'll get you the left-hand seat slot on the Series of Unlikely Explanations or the Xenu Express. That'll be a pretty basic busdriver's job like what you've been doing with P the last couple months. If you're willing to step up and take some more responsibility, though, I'll be willing to let you prove yourself as commander on Special Project #1.

Your call, Lena. Think it over & we'll talk about it once you're back in Kandor.

--Mal


From: K.Schrodinger (schroedinger@trigon.gov)
To: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Subject: RE: ...you've gotta be kidding me.
Date: 3 July 2013

Well, at least she hasn't tried to go Kill It With Fire on anything ... yet. I think I'm heading in the right direction.

Also, oi! I'll have you know the KJ is a perfectly adaptable multi-role craft, and the PEEBOs do great as an extension to the basic sensor grid as well as in other roles. The combat applications were mostly crammed in ... well ... because we could.

Anyway, yeah, hotswap should be possible. We mostly had Harley in there to help with the fiddly details of finishing the drive before she claimed the whole thing for her own. As long as you can crazyglue her Solid onto whatever drive your bird gets fitted with, she should be able to access things without any trouble.

You'd have to talk to her about whether or not she'd be willing, though given the fact that she was ready to just go off like this, I'm thinking she'll give you an 'aye'.

-Katz


From: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen
To: K.Schrodinger (schroedinger@trigon.gov)
Subject: ...you've gotta be kidding me.
Date: 3 July 2013

Hotswapping Harley shouldn't be a problem as long as the AI hub isn't too inconvenient. We've got a couple avonics bays that should fit a standard sized Solid no problems, just plug in a 220V and some fiber lines to the main systems.

Comm Harley & let her know the score for me, wouldya? When she gets here I'll send Dee out with to extract her, and you can pick up your new toy in lunar orbit.

--Mal


From: Elena Vangeek (susan@sovietairforce.fen)
To: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Subject: Re: If there's still room
Date: 4 July 2013

I'd be glad to take the left hand slot, boss, if that's where you need me. As to more responsibility...well, yeah. I guess we'd have to talk about it when I get back. I do know I'm too scared to even think of myself as a commander, but I also know I'd do my damned best. Even though I'll probably always be a civvie at heart.

Cheers,

B


From: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
To: Elena Vangeek (susan@sovietairforce.fen)
Subject: Re: If there's still room
Date: 4 July 2013

*shrug* We're short-staffed when it comes to people I'm willing to trust to be in charge. Shad, Calc & KJ are staying behind to fulfill our obligations to OGJ, I'll be on P and Kat & Zib are riding with the Canadian contingent. As much as I'd like to have the family all on one ship, that's just not in the cards. Four people (and one married couple), four ships...

Like I said, think it over. Actually... I've got an interview for KJ's replacement on P coming up in a bit. How close to port are you guys right now?

--Mal


From: Elena Vangeek (susan@sovietairforce.fen)
To: Col. Mal Fnord, VVS (23@globalfrequency.fen)
Subject: Re: If there's still room
Date: 4 July 2013

Well, if you need me, I'm there. I can be in Kandor in a few hours, by the way, if I break out the pixie sticks. Don't worry, Ptchika's chirping that she'll keep an eye on me.

I'll be right over, Bossman,

B


Subject: re: Last Minute Adjustments
from: LJG (vulpinefury@paragoncity.fen)
to: Dee (deechan@sovietairforce.fen)
05JULY2013 22:17 GMT

How is your face working for you? I hope the most recent adjustments we made will serve you better in overcoming the "uncanny valley." Honestly, my puppets never have that much trouble... Anyway, I hope we have everything cleared by your OS for general interaction. Trust me, some of the "wasted motion" you were worried about will help prevent the "toaster" jokes. You should have control over the percentages on that anyway.

You should have several settings now for your "unconscious facial mannerisms."

0: Fake. No attempt made to hide the artifce of your visage, worst Uncanny Valley response. I'd recommend only using this alone, with people you know well, or if you need to play possum.

1: Animatronic. From a distance, better response than 0. On par with a well-run Hardtech Disney attraction.

2: Henson. Midpoint response from us meat-bags. You'd look like a virtuoso puppet performance by a master of his craft. Well, Dirtside, if you disallow the Wave. This is acceptable in general, as most folks won't twig to something being off unless they're observant.

3: Soong. This setting will put you on par with a good human actor pretending to be a robot. Should get you props from the Trekkies if you don't mind them knowing what this algorithm is called.

4: Pinocchio. At this point most folks' response to meeting you will be akin to meeting a full conversion Cyborg whose only remaining "meat" is what we've created. Exactly what you wanted to achieve. You should be able to pass for full human in the right clothes. This setting DOES use up biomimetic material that can be replenished by "eating." WHAT you eat isn't important as long as its organic in the purely chemistry sense. And don't forget to drink to replenish your tear and sweat "glands."

As per your request, I've bundled a hardcopy and flashdrive of repair specs for your face along with a sample of the custom strain of goop. It likes anything sung by a Muppet, "When You Wish Upon a Star," and the Nutcracker Suite.

Your Captain should have the items before your departure. Good luck, and come back in as few pieces as are comfortable.

----- Vulpine Fury's Puppetworks --------
Bleeding Edge 'Wavium Animatronics since 2011
2004 Atlas Park Drive, Kandor City, Luna


Subject: re: Last Minute Adjustments
from: Dee (deechan@sovietairforce.fen)
to: LJG (vulpinefury@paragoncity.fen)
05JULY2013 22:37 GMT

The OS interaction seem to be working pretty well... thanks again for your work on this. After the discussion on the "wasted motion" mannerisms, I'd been trying to see what I could come up with in emulation on my own. Some success, maybe most of the way to what you called the "Henson" level (as an aside, I have to approve of the labels) but... well, only so far you can get through observation maybe?

At any rate, the "Soong" and full "Pinnochio" levels are excellent, and given what Mal has mentioned by way of mundanes being along is going to come in handy. Getting in the habit of eating and drinking will likely take a little getting used to, but that could well be fun in and of itself.

Thank you again for your magnificent work, and I'll try to keep to the normal number of pieces.

-D


From: kirk.teller@amberstaracademy.venus
To: fnord@sovietairforce.fen
Subject: RE: Welcome to the Delta Pavonis Expedition
Date: 5 July 2013

We're confirming transportation now. Thank you for your congratulations, I shall endevour to maintain that honor.

I already picked out what I considered bare essential supplies. I seem to have almost a kilo free at the moment, but supplies always expand to fill allowances so I am sure something will sneak into my bag before I leave.


K. Teller


From: tabby.small@amberstaracademy.venus
To: fnord@sovietairforce.fen
Subject: RE: Welcome to the Delta Pavonis Expedition
Date: 6 July 2013

I understand there is a desire to avoid freaking the danes on this mission. However through some fast talking I have secured the opportunity, should it be agreeable, to take our transport with us. We have been provided with a Sunflower to use as a lander since the ship we have secured room on is heading for Earth rather than the moon. I'm sure you already have access to the information on the Sunflowers, but I have included a link to the Neo Tokyo Shipyard's page about them. The one we will have can store solar energy, but does have a fondness for Strawberry Pocky. If there is insufficient space, or it does not look like a good match for the mission it will be no problem to arrange for it to be picked up by someone else.

Tabitha Small


From: fnord@sovietairforce.fen
To: tabby.small@amberstaracademy.venus
Subject: Sunflower
Date: 6 July 2013

Regarding your personal transport, we'll have to see how our final space considerations shake out. If we end up with enough room, we'll take it. If not, feel free to keep it in storage at Korolev until we get back. That's no hardship at all, we're planning on maintaining a parking garage for most of our new hires.

--Col. Fnord