Saint Bernard

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Spacecraft Registry
SS Saint Bernard
Spacecraft Characteristics
Base HullC-97 Stratofreighter
Drive TypeReactionless thrusters
OwnerMr. Johnson
Flag of RecordKuni no Karasu
Registry NumberNone
PurposeMobile Home & Office
Primary CrewMr. Johnson (Owner/Operator)
Auxillary VehiclesSS Jaime Retief (’waved Vauxhall Cavalier)
an unnamed Dodge Charger (not yet ’waved but roadworthy)
Operational StatusActive
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(Created by drakensis)

Known Vehicle Quirks

  • Itsnotmygoddamnplanet: The Saint Bernard is highly averse to planets and will not approach them too any marked proximity. This makes an actual homeport all but impossible.
  • Dream a little dream: The Saint Bernard’s power systems will not function unless someone experiences REM sleep aboard every couple of days. Mr Johnson has no recollection of any dreams aboard and is not sure that he wishes to.
  • Ain’t nothin’ but a Hound Dawg: The Saint Bernard displayed some canine traits - it spins its propellers for people it likes (Mr Johnson and Maetel of the Galaxy Express being the known examples) and when not under power occasionally chases its own tail for amusement.
  • Karma Chameleon: The Saint Bernard’s hull is of variable hue - usually silver to the point of acting as a mirror, it will also display whatever will blend into the background. If the pilot could control this it would be very useful. As it is, it’s a positive hazard to navigation.

Known Crew Quirks

  • Mr. Johnson is also known by many pseudonyms, not all of them chosen by him. His personal name is usually guessed as Asuma or Lando, his family name as Johnson, Morden or Lee.
  • He’s also pretty bad with other people’s names.
  • Given Mr. Johnson’s rumoured wealth (certainly his personal income should be considerable), the Saint Bernard could be extremely luxurious. This is not the case - with few exceptions, the interior is rather spartan.


Dimensions: 110'×141'×38' in its longest dimensions

Recorded Firsts:

  • First ’waved vehicle to be issued a diplomatic passport
  • First aircraft bought from the Davis-Monthan AFB for the purposes of being ’waved